I hate that when all is said and done, it becomes a competition to see who can stop hurting first, who can stand and smile first, who can move on the fastest.
I won’t pretend my heart has stopped aching when it hasn’t; I won’t pretend I don’t stare at my phone from time to time and wonder if you’ve thought of me at all, even once, since we broke up; I won’t pretend it doesn’t hurt when I see a picture of you and it seems like you’ve already moved on.
I don’t know what to feel now that it’s over—or how to pick up the pieces—but that’s okay because I know I’ll be okay.
I just won’t succumb to some false belief that I need to appear happier than you, or that I should appear to have moved on, if I haven’t—it’s been less than a week; no one should expect me to be okay.
And I’m okay with feeling the heartbreak for as long as I need to because, like John Green once wrote, that’s the thing about pain…it demands to be felt.